by Don Shepherd
Distressed, frustrated, displeased with the status quo of my persona. Been reading: Snakes in Suits: When Psychopaths Go To Work, Babiak & Hare 2006 Harper Collins. (No I am not a psychopath - I have way to much empathy.) This passage from the book stopped me in my tracks as the authors talked about surviving the devastation of being in the sphere of psychopathy; in the funk of life.
One key to overcoming frustration is information. The amount of accurate information you have about the change, in particular, the potential impact of the change on you - answers to the question, "What's in it for me?" - can and will affect how long you remain frustrated. Honest and accurate information is the antidote to concerns and fears brought on by impending change. Seeking information is a natural response to disruptions to the status quo; it is an attempt to reestablish stability in a seemingly unstable world. (p. 155)It is May 23, 2015 on this date in 1969 my wife agreed to support me "...for better or for worse, sickness and in health...." I want to thank you again for making that commitment to me, for I have inadvertently tested you in all those ways as only I could. Forgive me of my insufferableness. I am sorry I introduced you to my coping skills - abusive eating. 4 yellow roses for each decade and 6 red for the years of the decade - tomorrow.
I have been looking outside the blinders this old nag has been wearing and realizing somewhere I lost my persona to bile - old failures that are stacked like old rotting logs on the fenceline of my life.. My new desire is create lovely yellow, sweet, refreshing, ice cold lemonade from my past bitterness. I must try to be fearless, courageous, and forgiving to move on.
When you see me you got to ask yourself, "How big is he?"
No excuses here only an honest declaration and acknowledgement: I have an eating addiction that is literally eating me alive and I am dying day by day by the affects of my food addictions. For all of you who have recently joined the ranks of bariatric surgery survivors and are being successful I want to thank you for the courage and perseverance you have and are displaying daily to all of us who have taken the cut of the knife but not relinquishing of the addictions. Kudos to K. Joy, Debbie, Kerrie, Rick, Sarah.
Spear in the ground time. Line in the sand.... The walk will be hard but the results will be worth it. The addiction will not win. I am within a greater power.
